Just a quick post from Taiyuan before we take our first flight together to Guangzhou….

He promptly attempted to eat this confidential message after transmission.

I’m typing this entry with a well-deserved birthday beer in my hand after a very, very trying day. Overall, my 32nd birthday was incredible– having a new son and being in a beautiful land and all.  However, today is the day when parenting got real– and when all the adoption training came in handy– these people know what they’re saying! (little shout out to our social worker!)

Today, the main goal was to acquire our son’s Chinese passport and finalized Chinese adoption papers– success thanks to our representative Bill. As far as the Chinese government is concerned, we’ve got custody of this little guy from here on out. Now, our next hurdle is to present all of this material to the American consulate in Guangzhou in order for them to issue our man his immigration papers–which will take most of next week.

Because we had some extra time on our hands, our guide drove us to Jinci Temple, a beautiful old temple and grounds. A few photos follow below…

Warning- if we invite you over to meet Alexander, you might also be subjected to our home movies!

At Jinci Temple

This tree is more than 3200 years old– making it the third oldest tree in China.

Picturesque Jinci

Before mechanical clocks, towns used drum and bell towers along with water clocks. Most towns had both a drum tower and a bell tower–which announced the opening and closing of the city gates.

Architecture and artwork dating back to the Song dynasty

We spent the afternoon back in our room relaxing. After Brian and Bill left to get a few supplies, Alexander and I managed to get some quality bonding time. Although he’s doing incredibly well, he’s still terrified of new people, and even when Brian or I leave the room for an extended time, he’s somewhat frightened of us by the time we return. I guess you could call it a mixed blessing, but by the time the men returned from their short errand trip, Alexander had decided that I was his caregiver, and that Brian was clearly the devil. We were prepared over and over again by our agency and other adoptive families that this would occur. In the long term, this is a very good thing, because it shows that he’s beginning to form attachments and trust. In the short time, it can be really stressful for both the parent who can’t leave their child’s eyesight (lest they melt down) or for the parent who can’t do anything to make them happy either. One adoptive family told us by the time they reached Guangzhou, the father/husband couldn’t even push the stroller because the kid would flip out. While Alexander isn’t that bad, it’s very clear through his yowling that I’m the lady of the day.

We’ve been pushing through the afternoon and evening despite our little man’s protests, and thanks to our training, are still trying to instill that dad isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. Brian strapped the little man in the carrier and did a lot of carry-time along with the evening feedings and diaperings all the while enduring a boatload of crocodile tears and whining.

Brian working his charm on two very small cold shoulders.

Now, our little dragon is finally asleep– thank goodness! We’ve figured out a routine that seems to work (knock on wood), but we’ll see how long it lasts. For any of you adoptive parents reading this (you know who you are!), you’re well aware of how difficult handling sleeping can be with children used to institutionalized care. My heart breaks seeing just how terrified he is that we won’t be there in the morning and how traumatized he is when he wakes up in the night. This, by far, is the toughest undertaking we’ve ever had– but it’s also the most rewarding.

I’ll end this post on a lighthearted note– I was surprised by the staff at our hotel with a lovely birthday cake delivered to our room. Alexander was pitching a fit on the bed while I prepared his bottle (we have to do it out of his eyesight– as soon as he sees it, he goes NUTS. This kid clearly wasn’t being fed enough…) when our doorbell rang with the cake. I felt totally frazzled with kid yowling, bottle in the sink, and someone at the door.

Birthday greetings from the Shanxi Grand Hotel

For several years now, all I’ve ever wished for on my birthday is for the gift of motherhood. I thought to myself as I was juggling a kid in one arm and trying to converse poorly in Mandarin with the room attendant– “Hey, I finally got my wish!”